Sunday, February 19, 2012

10 Secrets to a Peaceful Family Home

by Cherry Moriones Doromal

How excited are you to coming home from work or school each day? Is your home the best place you can share your biggest smile, laugh at the top of your voice, and be tranquil whether awake or asleep?
How do we attain and maintain a peaceful home? Here are some tips:

1.    Constant and proper communication. As in any other kind of relationship, regular communication is the key to understanding your spouse, kids or any other member of your family.  Lack of communication draws you apart from one another, bringing about miscommunication, misunderstanding and declining relationship.

It’s not an excuse that you’re the silent type.  A simple compliment like “You look wonderful” or a word of concern like “How’s your day?” and “Have you eaten yet?” are powerful single-liners. Communication may not, at all times, be expressed only in words—text messages, sticky notes, a smile, a cup of coffee, hugs and kisses are gestures that communicate better relationships.

 As to the other party, it’s important that he takes time to LISTEN and is sensitive to what’s being communicated to him.

2.    Make time for your loved ones. Busy?  Who can't be busy in today’s society? Even our pets at home may be busy doing their stuff. Set aside a quality moment with your family. It doesn’t matter how short or long each day, as long as your time and thoughts are exclusively devoted for your spouse or kids on that particular moment. It may be a 15-minute meal time without interruptions, or a two-hour movie time.

3.    Renew your love every day. It’s sad to realize that a lot of people around the world feel like their homes are a battlefield where enemies are ready to strike from any corner.  As a result, they end up seeking for comfort from the outside world or other people, and most likely, they engage themselves to vices.

 Another secret to achieving peace in your home is to fall in love with your spouse every single day. Don’t let yourself be enticed by things which will ruin your relationship. Never get tired of rekindling the sweetness you had when you were at the peak of your happy relationship.

4.    Consider your family in making life’s choices. Opportunities come and, sometimes, being overwhelmed with them makes us decide in a flash without thinking of consequences. Think wisely when making decisions and consult your spouse to be certain he’s open about them and is willing to support you along the way.

5.    Set rules but be reasonable. As parents, it’s all right to set rules to our kids— no video games on school days,  reward for a perfect grade, no smoking, etc. Be careful, though, in setting up rules, and be sure that your rules are workable. Give everyone a certain level of freedom to express themselves or their opinions. If your kids (especially the teens) look at you as a modern day Hitler whose wishes couldn't be challenged, your kids might rebel against you. In rebellious acts begin many disorders at home.

6.    Don’t spread unhealthy rumors about your family. Every home has its own imperfection.  Siblings clash and spouses disagree occasionally. Don’t gossip about your own family because this will cause unlimited trouble for everyone.

7.    Don’t gossip about somebody else’s life. It is a basic rule that we shouldn’t meddle into the lives of other people. If you‘re not a party to issues outside of your home, and if you’re not being requested to give sound advice, it would be best that you keep your mouth from talking about your neighbor’s lives to avoid chaos.

8.    Settle issues as soon as possible.  Should there be any disagreement in your family, resolve the problem as soon as possible. How soon? Within the day!  This might sound irrational especially when the matter is a big issue. Call me extreme, but, I think there’s nothing too big when we’re talking about preserving peace in our own home. We’re protecting our family relationship here.

 Stop waiting for the right timing in the future because, most likely, pride will take its course, and no reconciliation will be had. It’s good to be guided by Biblical principles such as, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger.” ( Eph. 4:26 )

9.    Desire peace.  “THINK ABOUT”, “SAY”, and “DO” things which will bring peace into your home. Remember, what we sow is what we reap.

10.    Pray with your family. This is the ultimate secret that I would like to impart. Pray with your family and ask God to take control of every situation in your life.

Praying together may not mean the family being physically together in one room. Many homes have family members in other places, for work or other reasons.

By praying together, it may mean setting a certain time of the day wherein everyone will pause for a moment to pray for the family, anywhere he may be. It may also mean praying at no specific time, where everyone will pray for a common intention about the family.

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6 )

More posts:What and Where We Eat in the Philippines
                   More Eats Coming Up
                  Take Time with your Loved Ones
                  Dating Ideas for Married Christian Couples
                  How to Strengthen Parent Teen Relationship
                  How to Discipline a Child with Minimal or No Spanking
                  International School-- MGIS, Mahatma Gandhi Scholars 

  "Cherry Moriones-Doromal, an educator at the Mahatma Gandhi International School (MGIS), is a proud advocate of high-quality global education."
Other Writings by Cherry Moriones Doromal:

Ways to love your old newspapers

Wow eating manners!

Freeze it!

Journal of a Practical Mom

Honoring a decade of  happy marriage

Summertime ironies are cool

On Sowing and Reaping

Leave the crab behind

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